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Monday, September 05, 2005

Instructions on how to clean your toilet






1. Put both lids of the toilet up and add 1/8 cup of pet shampoo to the
water in the bowl.
2. Pick up the cat and soothe him while you carry him towards the
bathroom.
3. In one smooth movement, put the cat in the toilet and close both
lids. You may need to stand on the lid.
4. The cat will self agitate and make ample suds. Never mind the noises
that come from the toilet, the cat is actually enjoying this.
5. Flush the toilet three or four times. This provides a "power wash"
and rinse".
6. Have someone open the front door of your home. Be sure that there
are no people between the bathroom and the front door.
7. Stand behind the toilet as far as you can, and quickly lift both
lids.
8. The cat will rocket out of the toilet, streak through the bathroom,
and run outside where he will dry himself off.
9. Both the commode and the cat will be sparkling clean.
Sincerely,
The Dog

##############################################################################

The operator replied, 'I'm sorry. Mr Spenser is deceased. Can anyone
else
help you?' The man said no and hung up.

Ten minutes later he called again and asked for Mr. Spenser, his
broker.
The operator said, 'You just called a few minutes ago, didn't you? Mr.
Spenser has died.
I'm not making this up.' The man again hung up. Fifteen minutes later
he called a third time
and asked for Mr. Spenser. The operator was irked by this time.

'I've told you twice already, Mr. Spenser is dead. He is not here!
Why do you keep asking for him when I say he's dead?'
The man replied, 'I just like hearing it.'

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