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Thursday, March 16, 2006

Spring fever (pg)iggles

My garden pond last summer.

Jesse Jackson got out of the shower and was drying off when he looked in the mirror and noticed he was white from the neck up to the top of his head.
In sheer panic and fearing he really was turning white and might have to start working for a living, he called his doctor and told him of his problem.
The doctor advised him to come to his office immediately. After an examination, the doctor mixed a concoction of brown liquid, gave it to Jesse and told him to drink it all.
Jesse did and replied, "that tasted like bull shit!"
The doctor replied, "It was, Jesse. You were a quart low."


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"I can't imagine life without you," she whispered. "I wouldn't want to live without you." She began to weep. "Oh, baby," I said pulling her head to my chest, "don't cry. I hope you never have to live without me, too." She sniffled, wiped her eyes and looked up at me. "What, you want me to die FIRST? You believe could live without me?" "What? No! That's not what I meant...." "Thanks a lot!" she said walking away from me. "Drop dead."

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